Recently, a few of us were having a conversation about how divorce should be handled, and one word kept coming up more than any other. Serenity.
It’s an interesting concept, and has multiple connotations depending on your life and experiences. But as we discussed it, we came to settle on the idea that serenity happens in a divorce when we agree to accept that things are the way they are — and that’s okay. It’s that moment where you stop worrying about who gets what, and focus on getting through this difficult time with your wits intact.
Of course, this is easier said than done.
In a world where “looking out for yourself” in a divorce means trying to win, how do we change this to actually looking out for yourself? Is there really a way to tough out the loss and hurt of a divorce and still maintain that serenity that is so important to your overall wellbeing?
Of course there is, and it’s simpler than you thought.
- Accept that you will get through this. It might not feel like it now, but you will.
- Don’t just take moments to distract yourself. Balance it out with moments where you allow yourself to be cathartic. Take time to cry. You don’t always have to be tough.
- Look at your divorce as the turning of a page, instead of the period on the end of a sentence.
- Make a promise to yourself to only control the things you can control. Dump the rest.
- Breathe. It’s the basics of life.
- Accept that your ex might be aggressive and confrontational. That’s their way of dealing with it, but nothing says you have to stoop to the same level. Stay calm in the face of anger, and you’ll be surprised at the results.
Nobody can wave a magic wand and make your divorce easy. But when you focus on yourself, and not anything else — you’ll have the strength to meet the day. And the day after that. And the day after that. And then the day after that.
Before you know it, you’re strong again.
Divorce is never an easy time. You deserve a lawyer who can treat your divorce with the care and respect you deserve. Use our Contact Us page to speak with an attorney who can guide you through this difficult time.