Nobody likes getting a divorce. They do happen, unfortunately, and they can cause a lot of stress and anguish. A lot of people however, are making their divorce much harder than it needs to be.
5. Nobody Wins A Divorce
Not only does nobody win these things, but everyone loses. Going into your divorce thinking it’s some kind of battle to be won is just going to make things worse for everyone. Make sure you and your lawyer aren’t going into this with the aim of hurting the other party. Haven’t you all been hurt enough?
4. Don’t Get Bogged Down In Meaningless Details Because Of Your Ego
If you’re arguing for a week over who gets to take the coffee table home, just on principle — you’re doing this wrong. There’s moments in a divorce where you have to choose your battles and look at the bigger picture. You might have to give a few things up, but it’s worth it in the end when you’re not ripping your hair out from stress. Take a step back from things and ask yourself if some of these things you’re arguing about are really that important.
3. Don’t Bring The Kids Into It
This is hard enough on your kids without them being chess pieces in a battle they never agreed to join. There’s no point in bringing your kids into the fighting, and it will just set a bad example for them in life. Don’t let the kids see you fighting and don’t tell them all the dirt on your ex. You don’t want the children to be the most mature ones in the divorce.
2. Keep. It. Off. Of. Social. Media.
Anything you post about your divorce on social media, you will regret. There’s a reason they call it “airing your dirty laundry” — it stinks. Don’t post about it on Facebook, don’t tweet about it, don’t blog about it, and don’t make YouTube videos. Don’t post any secrets on Whisper and don’t send any private information anywhere. Whatever you say or post on there, without a doubt will come back to haunt you. Write it in a journal if you have to, but keep it off of the internet. It just complicates things.
1. Your (Soon To Be) Ex Is Not The Enemy
There’s no enemy here, because this isn’t a war. You’re not fighting and you’ll both be a lot better off in the long run if you just get through this thing and move on with your lives. Treat your ex with some respect, and they’ll return the favor. The whole process is smoother and less painful when you treat each other like adults.